


Beetle Bug, I Love You

by the_link_dock



Category: HIStory3: 那一天 | HIStory3: Make Our Days Count
Genre: Anxiety, Awkward Flirting, Awkward Tension, Awkwardness, Big Gay Love Story, Boys In Love, Bullying, Camming, Canon Gay Relationship, Confident Xiang Hao Ting, Drama & Romance, Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified, Eating Disorders, Enemies to Lovers, Falling In Love, Gay Bar, Gay Panic, Getting Together, Hao Ting Stalks Xi Gu, Hao Ting in love, Hao Ting is bad at feelings, Harassment, High School, Idiots in Love, Love Confessions, Love Triangles, Lovesick Xiang Hao Ting, M/M, Nipple Play, Poor Xi Gu, Protective Hao Ting, Protectiveness, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Discovery, Self-Doubt, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, Shy Yu Xi Gu, Shyness, Smitten Hao Ting, Stalking, Strip Tease, Stripping, Sweet, Sweet Yu Xi Gu, Teenage Dorks, Teenage Drama, Xi Gu has limited social skills, Xiang Hao Ting becomes a watcher, Xiang Hao Ting panics, Xiang Hao Ting slips the friendship, Yu Xi Gu becomes a camboy, Yu Xi Gu had a minor eating disorder, Yu Xi Gu works through his problems, camboy au, its between shiyu hao ting and xi gu, kind of, we know this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-04-22
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:08:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,507
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23708131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_link_dock/pseuds/the_link_dock
Summary: Yu Xi Gu needs money, Turns out being a camboy pays well.
Relationships: Lu Zhi Gang/Sun Bo Xiang, Xiang Hao Ting/Yu Xi Gu
Comments: 29
Kudos: 99





	1. Becoming Beetle Bug

**Author's Note:**

> first: I’m sorry
> 
> second: i don’t know if i did the brother thing right, if i didn’t feel free to let me know
> 
> the fangirls in xi gu’s class are annoying and energetic so they talk like this!!! with extra punctuation

Had Yu Xi Gu _planned_ on becoming a camboy? 

No. 

Was it surprisingly lucrative?

 _Absolutely_. 

It all started when Xi Gu got his first phone. 

Lu Zhi Gang gave Xi Gu a phone because he’d been worried about the skinny boy. 

Zhi Gang didn’t like that Xi Gu was walking home alone so late when Xi Gu’s apartment was in a seedy neighbourhood. Not to mention, Zhi Gang knew that Yu Xi Gu often lied about whether he’d eaten or not. 

While Zhi Gang knew a lot of the time it was to save money, at least he could text Xi Gu and remind him to eat so the boy couldn’t use forgetfulness as an excuse. 

Xi Gu tried to refuse it, but the way Zhi Gang phrased it made it sound like Xi Gu would be doing him a favour. 

“My cousin bought me a phone for my birthday and I don’t know what to do with this one. You always walk home late and I would really appreciate it if you would take the extra of my hands.”

Xi Gu couldn’t say no to a free smart phone, even if it wasn’t the newest, it had great service and graphics. 

And a great camera. 

Zhi Gang had let him take a break to eat and during his break, Xi Gu checked out all of the phone’s features and saw that Zhi Gang already had his LINE ID on Xi Gu’s phone. 

It made Xi Gu smile and lightly laugh. Brother Zhi Gang was a really caring person. 

Xi Gu knew the bare minimum of why Zhi Gang didn’t see his family anymore. At first, Xi Gu had been angry. How could Brother Zhi Gang leave his family for something as trivial as a boyfriend?

But Xi Gu had seen how hurt Zhi Gang was. He talked about his family with sadness but a resignation that he couldn’t change it. 

It was hard for Xi Gu to understand that not all family members were worth having. 

That was how Zhi Gang came out to him. Almost a year after working for Zhi Gang, and six months after the two started to become friendly, Zhi Gang took him out to dinner. 

The man drank, admittedly, more than he should’ve and it made him talkative. 

He started to cry and Xi Gu didn’t know what to do other than take the man home and listen to him rant any being alone forever. 

That night changed the relationship from boss to brother. 

So much so, that Zhi Gang felt comfortable with giving Xi Gu an formative phone for free. 

If Xi Gu could’ve predicted where having a phone would leave him, he wonders if he would’ve accepted the gift at all. 

Xi Gu wasn’t sure exactly how he started camming, just that he’d heard his female classmates talking about naked guys and complaining about how much money they made. 

Xi Gu perked up, but pretended he was studying as he eavesdropped. 

“It’s not fair!” A girl with a bob whined. “He’s so handsome but to watch the full video we have to pay!”

Another girl pouted, “Yea? I paid ten dollars for a video and all I got was him unbuttoning his shirt!”

Xi Gu pursed his lips and discretely checked his chest. _Ten dollars for unbuttoning his shirt? For just one person...if ten people bought it, he could make a hundred dollars for ten minutes of work..._

After school, and after the security guard told Xi Gu to lock the classroom, Xi Gu took his time walking home to think about it. 

_He was really skinny... but he did have a fan club at school who appreciates his ‘aesthetic’._

He glared at the ground. /What if the school saw it? He wold need some sort of alias. The girls at school called him Yu Baby, would that be too obvious? 

He waited at a cross walk to check both ways before resuming his trek home. 

_Extra money wouldn’t hurt..._

When he reached his apartment, rather than eating dinner or studying more, he went online and looked up videos of naked men. 

Directly after, his face flushed red and he slammed his phone face down on the table. 

_They’re...so big_.

Xi Gu swallowed and looked at his bug as if it would be watching him. 

Xi Gu gave a nervous laugh and looked back at his phone, hesitantly turning it over and staring at the black screen. 

_What would Brother Gang think if he knew this is what Xi Gu was using his old phone for?_

Mentally stealing himself, Xi Gu turned his phone back on with a glare. /He needed the money. He could do this for the money. 

He searched how to make videos for money after watching a few “strip teases”. 

He found an article aimed at girls, but found the information helpful nonetheless. 

He searched for male “cams”, and grimaced when he saw all of them were muscular. 

He decided to search “skinny camboy”, and was less disappointed. 

Apparently, skinny men were in high demand. Xi Gu frowned as he skimmed through the videos. 

_These guys are still muscular. Will I make less money for being so thin?_

Everyone talked about his weight to him. They said he was too thin, that he was skinnier than a girl, that he needed to eat more, that he didn’t need to diet. 

It was annoying, but at least he had no doubt that he _was_ a skinny guy. 

He felt his face heat up as he registered for a camming website as a producer, rather than a viewer. 

He bit his lip as he thought about his username. He glanced at his beetle and looked back at the screen. “Beetle Bug?” 

He asked aloud as if someone would answer him. Beetle Bug wasn’t a sexy name, but it was definitely original and he wouldn’t be confused with anyone else. 

With a grimace and a sense of trepidation, he made Beetle Bug his user name. 

He set up his phone on his table and stacked books breeding it so it wouldn’t fall. 

He made sure his face was out of frame as well as any paper or clothing that could identify who he was or where he lived. 

He looked down at his chest and grimaced at the logo on his shirt. 

_Maybe he shouldn’t do this_. 

His stomach clenched in hunger and he winced. _He really needed the money_. 

He stepped out of his school shirt and looked at his work shirt. He but his lip with a frown. 

It was a blue button up with no distinguishable logos or marks...it could work. 

Xi Gu sighed and changed into his blue button-up and sat in front if his phone again, which had at this point gone dark. 

He clicked the camera icon and pressed record before he said back. 

_Should he...go for it?_

He reached his hands up to his shirt collar and swallowed thickly, noticing the camera could see his throat bob. 

He fingers were shaking and his heart was pounding. 

He spread open his shirt collar and tilted his head to the side as he watched his reflection in the recording, making sure not even his chin was visible. 

He let out a shaky breath and unbuttoned the second button. 

He went three down and parted his shirt to expose his sternum. He rubbed his bony hand across his chest and let out a harsh breath before jerking an arm out to stop recording. 

He was panting at this point from the build up of anxiety and held a hand over his heart and noticed his knees were trembling. 

He watched the video he recorded with embarrassment. No one was going to pay to see more than that. 

Still, he couldn’t give up the opportunity. He debated on what to title it. 

He could easily capitalise on his body type, so “skinny” would have to be in the title. 

_Should he include “nerd”? A lot of videos he saw were labelled as “jock”_. 

He took in a breath and labelled it, “Skinny Nerd Gets Shy.”

Really, he’d gotten scared, but he’d settle for shy. With a flush he thought about the girls in his classroom and knew their type would appreciate a small, fragile looking boy like himself. 

He furrowed his eyebrows and looked back at the title. He looked around his room and edited it. 

“Skinny Nerd Gets Shy, Teaser.”

That implied there was more to the video. If people would pay for it, Xi Gu would do it. 

If not, he would forget this night ever happened. 

He categorised the video and picked a screen cap for people to see and posted it before he could chicken out. 

Hopeful, he’d get a couple of views over night and by next week someone would ask for more. 

He closed out of his browser and plugged his phone in before changing into a baggy t-shirt and sweat pants that he had to roll over his waist. 

He laid in bed, still not processing that he’d actually posted a cam video. Hopefully it wouldn’t take a month to pick up, but if it did then Xi Gu could only wait. 

* * *

  
Yu Xi Gu woke up early as always. He did thirty minutes of studying while he ate bread and drank two glasses of water to fill his stomach. 

He walked to school quickly. Not because he was late, but he liked getting there early so he could study more. 

He set his phone on his desk and smile lightly at it. 

_Brother Gang was really nice to give it to him._

Xi Gu pulled out his books and started reading, not noticing when other students trickled in. 

He did over hear a conversation from the girls talking about naked guys yesterday. 

“I saw the cutest boy last night!” One of them squealed, and Xi Gu winced at the high pitched noise. 

“Where?! You always see the cute boys!” Another whined. 

“Not in real life,” The first one said, as if this was obvious. 

Xi Gu shook his head and tried to tune them out. 

“ _Oh_ , one of _those_ boys?” A third girl asked with teasing laughter. 

The first girl hummed and slammed her phone on their desk. “Less than two minutes of a strip tease but it was the best I’ve ever seen!”

Xi Gu’s eyes widened and he stared at the text in front of them. _Surely not..._

“You can tell he’s shy and is not just pretending! The way he ended it makes my heart pound because he’s so cute!”

Xi Gu lifted his head minimally to glance around the room and see if anyone was listening to the girls or looking at him. 

“What’s his name!?” The second girl demanded, pulling out her own phone. 

_It can’t be..._

Xi Gu felt his heart race and looked down to keep himself from staring at the girls. 

“Beetle Bug. It’s a weird name, but it oddly suits him? He seems really awkward and shy!! He’s a precious baby~!”

Xi Gu didn’t even check on how many views his video had gotten overnight. He figured it wouldn’t get any. 

He sat up and pulled his phone on top of his book and glanced around the room. 

_He needed to check...but he couldn’t let people see him...He’d have to do it in the bathroom_. 

Class started before he got the chance and he put his phone in his pocket with a grimace. 

_Surely, only those girls saw it_. 

With that thought, he pushed the subject from his mind and focused on class. He’d deal with it later. 

  
Later turned out to be lunch. In between classes, Xi Gu forgot to check his phone, so when he got to the nurses office, he checked his web page. 

His eyes widened at what he saw. 

Over 900 views!? People had _tipped_ him, meaning that two minute video made him _money_. 

His mouth dropped open. _Thirty dollars in tips for a two minute video!? How did people have so much money to spend!?_

He scrolled through the comments and felt his face heat up. 

“soooo cute!!!!!!!! >.<“

“ur adorb”

“so hooot”

“I don’t know if that was cute or hot...but I liked it.”

“wow is this you first time??”

“Awww, Beetle Bug, your hands are shaking! It’s okay!!”

  
And the rest were comments about his body and how tiny he looked. 

Xi Gu but his lip and closed out of his browser before laying down to sleep. 

_This could actually work_. 


	2. Beetle Bug, Don’t Cry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m still not used to how they address friends and familiars, so if it sounds weird or cultish (they call each other brother) sorry
> 
> Also, I’m writing Hao Ting’s girlfriend’s name as Shiyu because that’s how it is in the subtitles and I haven’t seen it as Xi Yu

Xi Gu felt someone breathing in his face and when he opened his eyes he saw Xiang Hao Ting’s face inches from his own. 

Xi Gu recoiled his head to get away from the notorious troublemaker’s and furrowed his brows. 

_What the hell is he doing?_

The school doctor came in and dragged Hao Ting away, even though the troublemaker claimed he was tired. 

When the two had left, Xi Gu breathed out a tired sigh and pushed himself up, feeling a headache at not being anne to sleep longer. 

He felt an embarrassed flush run through his body as he thought about last night and _why_ it had taken him so long to go to bed. 

The doctor came back in muttering about respecting privacy and Xi Gu gave a small smile. 

“Are you feeling better?” The doctor asked, sitting on his stool and opening Xi Gu’s file, that was already in his hand. 

Xi Gu closed his eyes tiredly and let out a soft hum, “Much better, thank you.”

The director poured at him with skepticism, “No dizziness? Black spots?”

Xi Gu gave a knowing smirk back but didn’t verbally respond. 

The doctor sighed and closed his file, “I should tell you to eat more, but I know you won’t listen.”

Xi Gu shook his head and pushed himself closer to the doctor, “No—! I will listen, I’m trying!”

Xi Gu didn’t want the doctor to think he was ignoring his recommendations, and Xi Gu didn’t want to seem disrespectful. 

The doctor raised an eyebrow and Xi Gu pursed his lips and looked to the side, “I’ve just been low on money...school materials aren’t cheap.”

Nothing he said was a lie. He just omitted that he’d already bought his school supplies. 

It wouldn’t look good if Xi Gu started making extra cash. 

The doctor nodded at once, “Of course. Being a student is extremely difficult. Make sure to keep your priorities straight.”

Xi Gu could tell the doctor wasn’t being condescending and bowed when he stood up, “Thank you for your concern.”

The doctor chucked and told him to go to class. 

Xi Gu flashed one last grateful smile before he grabbed his phone off the bed and left. 

He got to the classroom early and checked his page. 1200 views, ten more comments, but no more tips. 

Xi Gu closed out of the browser and put his phone in his pant pocket in disappointment. 

He rubbed his hands together after noticing how cold they were. For a moment he wished he hadn’t given Li Shiyu his jacket, but dismissed the thought and sat on his chair. 

Shiyu was being really annoying lately. Pestering him for tutoring even though he made it clear he didn’t want to nor have time for it. 

She gave him water, which was annoying because she wouldn’t take no for an answer. 

She made him help her put away the gym equipment, even though mid-term exams were in two days and he had to study. 

_Why has she chosen now to bother him? Couldn’t she see he didn’t have time for her?_

A hand clapped his shoulder and Xi Gu jumped, jerking his attention away from his text book to see Xia De standing there with a slight frown. 

“Brothers want you on the roof.”

Xi Gu glared and jerked his shoulder away and focused on his book, “I’m busy.”

Xia De clasped his shoulder again and Xi Gu’s glare deepened. “That wasn’t a request. Don’t make this worse by making them come down to get you.”

Xi Gu huffed but stood up and followed Xia De up the stairs. 

_Annoying and bothersome. I need to be studying, I don’t have time for this. I need to study now so I can work later._

Xia De opened the door for him and Xi Gu stomped over to where Sun Bo Xiang, Gao Xiao-Chun, and Xia En were gathered. 

“What’s this about?” Xi Gu demanded. 

Xia En, twin to Xia En, stalked close to Xi Gu. “Stay away from our brothers girlfriend.”

Xi Gu frowned, “I don’t like her, you should be telling her to leave me alone!”

Sun Bo scoffed and Xi Gu glared at him. “I didn’t do anything wrong!” Xi Gu growled. 

“What’s this, then?” Xiao-Chun asked, showing him a picture of Shiyu in his jacket. 

Xi Gu felt his mouth part in shocked anger and his brows furrowed, “She was cold, was I suppose to let her freeze?”

Xia En’s fist collided with Xi Gu’s chest before he could realise the bigger man was about to punch. 

Xi Gu fell to the ground as Sun Bo and Xiao-Chun held Xia En back. 

“Stay away from brother’s girlfriend! I’ll kill you!”

Xi Gu could barely hear the threats over the harshness off his own breaths and the pain in his sternum. 

If it bruised could he still film? What if people didn’t want to see damaged goods? He wouldn’t be able to film for another week. 

He felt an hand on his arm and wrenched it out of the grip. 

Xi Gu knew Xia De would be leaning over him, trying to help, but Xi Gu didn’t want his help. 

He wanted to be left alone. 

So he sat on the asphalt of the roof and trying to level his breathing while he waited for Xia De to leave. 

Getting to class was a struggle. Xi Gu was winded and standing up straight hurt. He felt dizzy and he had to continually take breaks by leaving against the wall. 

He’d worked up a light sweat by the time he made it back to the classroom. His stomach dropped when he realised class had already started. 

He needed a perfect record. Everyone would see him come in late. They’d all be watching him. He needed to cause as little of a scene as possible. 

He would apologise, and go to his seat. 

Instead, after he’d apologised and Teacher Huang dismissed him to his seat, Xi Gu was over taken by a wave of dizziness and pain in his abdomen and had to hold onto his teacher so he didn’t collapse. 

He felt his face heat up and He backed away from his teacher, dismissing Teacher Huang’s concern politely and going to his seat. 

He pointedly ignored Xia De’s concerned stare and focused on the lesson. 

After class he ran after Teacher Huang and pleased to not be marked absent. 

In the end, Xi Gu had to confess that Hao Ting’s gang bright him to the roof and hit him, then left him there. 

Xi Gu knew this would cause trouble further down the line, but he couldn’t bring himself to care as Teacher Huang agreed to let his tardiness slide this once. 

Xi Gu thanked him and went back to study. 

_He would still get the scholarship. Nothing to worry about as long as he has the scholarship. He’d be able to get into a national university and become an astrophysicist_. 

Later that day, he went to work and went home, forgetting about the incident until he was in his apartment and it was almost eleven o’clock. 

He plugged his phone in to charge even though it was at 70% with a sigh. He took his shirt off in the bathroom and stared at his chest. 

Already it was ugly with its skinniness. His collarbones protruded and his ribs pressed against his skin. 

When he brushed his hand against his side, watching with detached interest in the mirror, he could feel the divots between each bone. It felt delicate, like he should be a rich girl cherished rather than an underfed high school boy. 

He let his arm fall to his side and looked at his face. 

Xi Gu wasn’t overly concerned with looks. He didn’t think he was attractive or ugly. He was happily average, facial wise. 

His eyes were tired, but they were large and a dark brown. His lips were full and his teeth were white and straight. When he smiled he didn’t see himself as ugly. 

His cheekbones were defined by how hollow his cheeks were. It made Xi Gu grimaced at the reminder of how underweight he was. 

Xi Gu _hated_ how small he was. He was among the shortest males in the school. He was the same height as most of the girls, but he was thinner than them. 

It made him feel pathetic. To be smaller than a girl, too weak to defend himself. 

People told him he didn’t need to diet, as if he had a choice, and it made Xi Gu hate himself more. He knew he was ugly and undesirable. 

That was amplified by the bruising on his sternum from where Xia En hit him. It was dotted red with purple around the edges and ached sully when he focused on it. He pushed a finger against it and pulled it away with a hiss at the flare up of pain. 

It would be tender for a few days. 

He glared at his reflection. _Who could possibly find this attractive?_

His gaze drifted to where his phone lay on his bed charging. 

Over a thousand people found him attractive. Or, at least enough people to make him thirty dollars. 

If he could make a longer video and actually _sell_ it—

He looked back at his reflection. He couldn’t risk people seeing his bruises and knowing he was assaulted. 

Xi Gu didn’t think he was important or that people paid attention to him, but the idea of a bride being what gives him away was unbearable to think about. 

His gaze drifted further down to his pants. 

_Maybe...the lower half will make more? Just unbutton them and unzip them slowly..._

He shook his head with a flush and took his pants off. He pulled on his sweat pants and turned his lights out after pulling on a baggy white t-shirt. 

He was _not_ ready for his lower half to be on the internet. 

He got in bed and rolled onto his side. 

He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to go to sleep. 

After what felt like hours of laying in darkness, he pushed himself up and got up to turn the lights on. 

If he couldn’t sleep, he would study. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like in the show, Xi Gu still catches Shiyu, but because he genuinely doesn’t care about her, he doesn’t think about her until she keeps showing up and annoying him.
> 
> Also, Xi Gu doesn’t think women are weak or that they should be small, he’s just used to men being bigger so he feels like a failure for being so small. It’s got to do with internalised toxic masculinity, but it won’t play a huge part in this and Xi Gu will get over it, I just didn’t want people to think that he was sexist it misogynistic towards women.


	3. Beetle Bug Don’t Hurt Me

Xi Gu woke up earlier than usual with a dull ache in his chest, but when he looked in the bathroom mirror, there was barely any redness leftover. 

He shrugged and got dressed for school. 

Mid-term exams were in two days and Xi Gu needed to study as much as possible; he needed to ace this exam. 

Not only did his scholarship depend on it, the potential to get into a national college depended on how well he did on this test. 

He unwillingly skipped breakfast and drank two glasses of water instead. He hadn’t withdrawn the money he made from camming, so he didn’t have pocket cash to buy any food. 

The plan was after school, on the way to work, Xi Gu would stop by the ATM and with draw the thirty dollars and go grocery shopping tomorrow. 

He didn’t rush to school; he walked while he reviewed his notes and glanced up to make sure he wouldn’t run into anyone or walk into traffic. 

He made it to school earlier than usual and scrolled through the halls more relaxed than during the day. 

With no one around, he didn’t feel the need to guard his expression or focus on getting to class. He walked with leisure and mouthed the words that he read, even though he didn’t need to. 

In these moments, he felt like a real teenager, focused on his studies a normal amount; not worried about rent or money and not obsessing over tests. 

He walked into his classroom and halted at the sight of Xiang Hao Ting sitting on Xi Gu’s desk without a care in the world, playing a video game to top it off. 

Xi Gu immediately became cautious and felt his shoulders tense. He clenched his teeth when Hao Ting finally glanced up and saw him. 

Xi Gu gripped the strap of his back pack and held tightly onto his note book. He had no doubts that Hao Ting was there to cause trouble. 

It couldn’t be coincidence that Hao Ting’s brothers harassed Xi Gu yesterday and Hao Ting was here today. 

Especially since Xi Gu heard they all got cleaning duty for a week. 

He felt a dull throb in his chest from where Xia En hit him but kept his stare on Hao Ting blank. 

The bigger man gave a grin that Xi Gu would call dopey. 

“I’m sitting on your desk, aren’t I?” Hao Ting chuckled as if Xi Gu didn’t know what he was doing and it made Xi Gu scowl. 

Hao Ting pocketed his game and stood up, singing his backpack over one shoulder. 

“Meet me after school.”

Hao Ting smiled and left before Xi Gu could properly respond, but rather than chase the man down Xi Gu pursed his lips with a harsh breath through his nose and went to his desk, not quite hiding the disdain on his face. 

He would not be meeting Hao Ting after school. Xi Gu had work and had to get his money. 

At that thought, Xi Gu pulled out his phone and opened his browser to check how his video had done. 

He’d made an extra dollar, not a lot but still nice to see. 

His video now has three thousand views and two hundred comments. 

Xi Gu glanced around the room and looked at the time. Students wild begin to show up in twenty minutes or so. He knew the material that would be on the test and studied extra last night. 

He’d decided to spend this new found free time to read the comments. 

A lot of them were about how cute he was and it made Xi Gu’s face heat up. He knew these comments would be from horny girls that watched him for their boy’s love fantasy, but if it made him money, he couldn’t find it in him to be bothered. 

A surprisingly large amount asked for more. 

“Plz show more”

“Are you going to show more?”

“More”

“Where can I find more?”

“Do you have a video that goes further?”

And the rest were a mix of “hate” comments and thirsty comments. 

“Too skinny”

“My dick is bigger than your neck fuck”

“Pretty boys should suck cock”

“Ewwww people actually like this??”

“Got me hard”

“This was so hot I’m wet”

“Gross”

“Thumbs down, you need to eat more :(“

“Stop promoting eating disorders”

“Disgusting”

Xi Gu pursed his lips and closed out of the tab before locking his phone. 

As some as he put his phone in his pocket, a group of students walked in talking with each other. 

Xi Gu opened his note book to study some more, but couldn’t get his mind off the comments. _Why would people waste time by leaving negative comments?_

He couldn’t understand the thought process, other than they wanted to hurt his feelings. 

He snorted mentally. Those comments didn’t bother him. He didn’t mind the more sexual comments because they helped him pin down woo his demographic would be, which at the moment seemed like men. 

Hate comments didn’t make him upset. He knew he was ugly; they weren’t providing any new information. The only thing that bothered him were the comments about eating disorders. 

He didn’t choose to go hungry. Well, he did but it was to save money. 

It wasn’t like he was purposefully avoiding food he could afford. 

He rolled his shoulders and bent his head down as more students came in. 

_No time to focus on that. Time to study_. 

* * *

After school, Xi Gu power walked to the nearest ATM and withdrew his thirty-one dollars with a smile he couldn’t hold back. 

He’d done less than five minutes of work! Hopefully, he’d be able to do another video tonight, probably removing his entire shirt and maybe unbutton his pants too. 

If he made more money, he’d buy clothes just for filming so he didn’t have to worry about people recognising his uniform. 

He got to work less than two minutes late, but still profusely apologised to Brother Gang. 

He worked until ten thirty pm, when Zhi Gang told him if he didn’t leave, he would dock his pay. 

Xi Gu gave him a grateful smile and walked home with a skip in his step. 

No work tomorrow so he would have extra time to study before the test, and he’d be able to get groceries. 

He was slightly dreading having to film, but mainly because he was nervous. He’d gotten less than halfway down his button-up shirt, how was he supposed to take it off completely?

He pursed his lips then blew out a breath and looked at the sky as he walked. 

Would his parents be disappointed? He was stripping for strangers on the internet for money. 

He looked down and bit his lip. _He didn’t feel like they’d be disappointed. He was making a profit with his body. That was kind of impressive._

He snorted and spent the rest of the walk home planning what he would do. 

  
In his apartment, he made sure everything that has words was covered and out of frame and he set up his phone on his table like he had the first time. 

He did a final sweep through of his room and gave a shy smile to his beetle in silent apology. 

He sat down with his legs crossed and swallowed thickly and took in a suffering breath. 

He was nervous, but the excitement of making thirty dollars was a rush he wanted to feel again. 

After fixing his shirt collar, he pressed record and leaned back so his chest was in frame but his head was still cut out. 

He grazed his palms down his chest and sucked in a breath at the sensation. 

He slowly dragged his hands back up and undid the first two buttons before running a hand across his collarbone and shifting his head so it stood out more. 

Not once did he let even his chin in frame. 

He undid another button and laid a hand flat over the center off his chest. His breathing had picked up and he was getting nervous to go further. 

He moved his left hand across the right side of his chest and let out a surprised noise at the feeling of it brush against his nipple. 

He swallowed and let his mouth part to breathe as he repeated the motion, causing him to let out a whimper. 

He bit his lip in mortification, but pressed on. He wanted to completely unbutton his shirt. 

He took a silent breath and undid the last three buttons, parting it slowly and only enough for the edges of his nipple to be seen. 

He watched his stomach heave in and out while he tried to catch his breath and he let one of his hands run up the buttons of his shirt to edge the left side of his shirt over his shoulder and when his head wandered back down, it skirted over his pants, over his dick, and Xi Gu choked off a moan. 

He quickly ended the recording with his face flaming red. He made sure his phone was stopped and turned off before his stood up and took his shirt off completely, hanging it up in the closet before pulling on a baggy white t shirt. 

He changed his pants as well, pointedly avoiding his dick and turned out his lights. 

He sat on his bed with his phone in his hands. 

He grimaced as he tried to think of a title. _This is worse than stripping._

“Skinny Nerd Strips?” He questioned in a murmur. Could he use “skinny nerd” in all of his videos? Could that be his “thing”?

He scratched his forehead with a frown. “Skinny Nerd Strips Shirt?”

_That was more accurate, but what if it turned people away by not being enough?_

He settled for “Skinny Nerd Strips” and posted the video after reviewing before he could change his mind. 

He set his alarm and went to bed without dinner but with excitement that he could buy food tomorrow. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as always, please point out spelling errors or grammatical errors (or if a word doesn’t make sense, because it’s probably autocorrect) just be nice/polite about it!
> 
> thanks for reading!!

**Author's Note:**

> please tell me if you liked this
> 
> i’ve typed this twice because my first draft was deleted


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